Untitled

because I’m so far behind, another wasted half hour doesn’t even matter…


// series one – describe

— Your heritage: A grandparent each from England, Scotland, Ireland and Wales. But I mostly think of the English (because it’s where I’ve always lived) and the Irish (because my Irish ancestors were so much more interesting than the rest)

— The shoes you wore yesterday: I own two pairs of shoes: the steel-toecapped boots, and my brown things, which are pretty but falling apart. So it was the brown things.

— Your hair: Long, black, tangled. Hasn’t been cut for 4 years, but every now and again I pull out the really matted bits. It’s a mess, but I like it.

— Your fears: People knowing too much about me. Also forms.

— Your perfect pizza: Lots of meat. Pizza is about the only place where meat is essential

— One thing you’d like to achieve: Freeing myself from any desire to ‘succeed’. I want to be a hyperactive, playful slacker!

// series two – what is

— Your most overused phrase on aim: ‘to be fair’

— Your thoughts first waking up: ‘where are did I put my glasses *this* time?’

— The first feature you notice in the opposite/same sex: Voice, height, build. I’m not really very visual: often I’ll talk to somebody for half an hour and not recognise them the next day.

— Your best physical feature: Hair, probably. Or my eyes (but they’re hidden behind glasses).

— Your bedtime: Irregular. I tend to stay up until 4am one day, then sleep 12 hours the next to make up for it.

— Your greatest accomplishment: Getting the ‘dodgy dossier’ story out to the world last year: I was the link between this and this. *beams*

// series three – you prefer

— Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi. Not on taste, but because two years ago I spent some time teaching English to a Russian Coke salesman, and he was so wonderfully pissed off at how Russia chose Pepsi

— McDonald’s or Burger King: Prefer vans and chippies with real local grease

— Single or group dates: um, neither. I’m a single, and neither want/dare date, or think I ‘d have any luck if I did.

— Adidas or Nike: Anything cheap and unbranded.

— Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Don’t drink either, but Lipton keeps my sister hapy.

— Chocolate or vanilla: Strawberry. OK, Chocolate, if you insist

— Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee

— Boxers or briefs: boxers

// series four – do you

— Cuss: Mostly at inanimate objects. And politicians, but they’re fair game for anything short of assassination.

— Sing well: No. Really no. And so I don’t sing at all, which is sad.

— Take a shower everyday: Yes. Cambridge has showers. Oakham, as far as I can tell, doesn’t. Three years in, and I’m still loving it!

— Do you think you’ve been in love: Yes. Painfully, obsessively, and with all the drama that a rejected teenager can muster. I’m going to make damn sure it doesn’t happen again.

— Want to go to college: I’m at uni.

— Liked high school: No. Partly teenage grumpiness. Partly the falling stupidly in love. Partly the usual ‘nobody understands me’ thing (nobody understands me here either, but there are lots of people who each understand a bit of me, so it works out OK). Mostly just the dump of a small town I was in, and the lack of anyone interesting there, old or young.

— Want to get married: No. It’s the not wanting to fall in love thing, and not being able to imagine spending an entire lifetime with somebody. That and Patriarchy

— Type w/ your fingers on the right keys: Yep. And fast.

— Believe in yourself: No, except for brief moments when I have absolute blind faith in myself. Fortunately those moments generally happen when I’m alone, so they aren’t inflicted on anyone else.

— Get motion sickness: Yes.

— Think you’re a health freak: No.

— Get along with your parent(s): My dad is way cooler than me or most of my friends. I get on really well with him. My mum I respect immensely, but don’t have much in common with, and I find her really hard to talk to.

— Like thunderstorms: Yes. Preferably outside, in the countryside, and as close to naked as possible.

— Play an instrument: No. Piano a bit, but not for many years, or with much skill to begin with.

// series five – in the past month, did/have you

— Drank alcohol: yes

— Done a drug: No

— Made Out: No

— Gone to the mall?: No. Don’t think I’ve bought anything except food, tickets for a few things, and household bits ‘n’ bobs.

— Eaten an entire box of Oreos: What is this Oreo of which you speak?

— Eaten sushi: No, never

— Been on stage:

— Been dumped: No. Benefit of being single!

— Gone skating: No.

— Made homemade cookies: No.

— Been in love: No

— Gone skinny dipping: No. It’s November, for chrissakes!

— Dyed your hair: No. Would like to, but suspect the dye would need to come in a van (long and black not a good combination for dyeing)

— Stolen anything: No.

// series six – have you ever

— Played a game that required removal of clothing?: Yes

— Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Yes

— Been caught “doing something”: No

— Been called a tease: No.

— Got beaten up: Not seriously, and not for many years.

— Changed who you were to fit in: Yes. But not nearly as often as I’ve denied what I am because I’ve been embarassed to fit in.

// series seven – the future

— Age you hoping to be married: Never

— Numbers and Names of Children: I’d make a good uncle or godfather, but an awful father.

— Describe your Dream Wedding: Quickly and quietly, as part of some legal/political scam. Mika, Kelly: you’re the only newlyweds I’ve honestly admired.

— How do you want to die: suddenly and dramatically

— Where do you want to go to college: here will do.

— What do you want to be when you grow up: as above: hyperactive and playful, changing job and lifestyle. My nightmare is ending up in a pleasant office job, and not having the initiative to quit and spend a year flipping burgers.

— What country would you most like to visit: Georgia

// series eight – opposite/same sex

— Best eye color?: green

— Best hair color?: Black. And men with long, light ginger hair look gorgeous.

— Short or long hair?: Long. Always long.

— Best height: Not fussed.

— Best weight: Thin.

— Best articles of clothing: Anything that stands out. I love clothes that get laughter from half the people, and impress the rest.

— Best first date location: as above: loner!

— Best first kiss location: loner! (it’s the singleton’s ‘get out of jail free’ card)

// series nine – number of

— Number of boys/girls I have kissed: 0 (assuming cheek-pecking doesn’t count)

— Number of boy/girlfriends I have had: none

— Number of drugs taken illegally: One.

— Number of people I could trust with my life: depends on the context.

— Number of CDs that I own: twenty? thirty?

— Number of foreign countries I have visited: 3

— Number of states I have visited: none. 1

— Number of piercings: none, yet.

— Number of scars on my body: none

— Number of things in my past that I regret: mostly I regret the things I didn’t do

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